In which I share my heart

I started this blog nearly 4 years ago. At that point in my life I had a newborn, a 4.5 year old, and a 2.5 year old. I was an at home mommy and blogging for my family and reading other blogs served as mommy time for me. My blog has given me an outlet for all my tales and the things I was experiencing in my days with little ones. I linked up with other mommy bloggers and developed cyber support and relationships. I felt connected to the outside world during those long days at home.


Today, I have two boys in school for 6 hours a day and an almost 4 year old, who is becoming more and more independent as the days go by. We have homework, practices, and/or church most weeknights. Our weekends are full of activity, work, and play as a family. In just a few short years my "season" of mommy hood has changed. I haven't changed my own child's diaper in over a year. And I find myself blogging a little less, and perhaps about different things.


I value the blog and the outlet it gives me. I love peeking in on the lives of everyone on my google reader, and still find lot of support here. I love that my family members and friends who live hours away can peak into our lives and get a glimpse at what we've been up to.
But, as evidenced my my last couple posts, I think I'll be blogging a bit less these days.


As I'm sure I've said before, I don't do change very well. Fall is here, my babies are growing up right before my eyes, and my days feel relatively quiet with just me and my side-kick, Anna. I feel it coming, but in some ways I am resistant. Some mommies dream of the days all their babies are in school. I admit it, I dream of having another baby.


I am not one to give advice, but I have to say: If you are a mommy like I was 4 years ago, live in the moment. Cherish those loud, busy, never ending days at home. Keep on keeping on. Read your kiddos a book, or twenty. Be silly and spontaneous. Take advantage of every impressionable moment. I am hopeful that I did that most days. But I know it never hurts to be reminded.


I am faithful that this new season in mommy hood will be every bit as enjoyable as the last. I do get excited when I look in Will's 8 year old face and can see both a glimpse of the baby he was, and the young man he is becoming. It's an exciting thing. But still, my heart seems to catch in my throat when I write about it. So I cling to this verse:

Being confident of this,

that he who began a good work in you

will carry it on to completion

until the day of Christ Jesus. ~Phil 1:6

There ARE a couple things I don't miss....

....boy, these were sure fun days, though! (She said 5 years later :)

~Wyatt fall 2004

I am not a runner

....but I ran my first race!

I finished, I ran (sloooow jogged) the whole way, and despite a terrible side ache, had a blast. I think it took me about 35 minutes or so, but silly me didn't notice the huge stop clock ticking at the finish line til after I stretched and got some water, so I can't be sure. I want to do it again....perhaps a 10K....anybody want to do it with me? If not, I'll have to talk Craig into it.

Football and Ballet

I feel so BLESSED to experience BOTH.

My baby goes to pre-school

It is a strange feeling when you go from feeling like your hands are full of kids, to actually have 5 kidless hours a week.....in just a few short years.

But here we are, my baby in pre-school.....

Showing off her long, "Rapunzel" hair for this shot......
Looking like a big school girl in this one....

So excited and ready for the day with dainty bear......

She seemed to love everything about this day. Said, "by, mom" and plopped down on the carpet. Had a big smile and hug for me when I came to pick her up. Told me how she didn't cry cause she knew I was coming back.

Wow, she's getting so big.

Another first day....

I was feeling pretty prepared for the boys' first day of school. I was about to fix dinner and wrap up the evening when a migraine struck. I took my prescription and headed to bed. "Can you please keep the kids quiet for a little while?", I asked Craig.

I've been struggling with migraine headaches ever since high school, and although it is a pretty minor issue God has taught me so much through my little struggle. Every time I get one, I always find myself in a conversation with God. Asking Him questions like, "why me?", "why now?" and, "why haven't you healed me?"

Yet always, He seems to speak to me in my time of suffering, when my head feels like it's going to explode, and I wish for a hammer to crack it open. As I'm puking and shaking because the pain is just to much to take.

"I've got you though it before, trust me to get you through this one. Have I ever given you reason to doubt Me?"

He did get me through it, and my family blessed me so much last night. Craig fixed dinner. The kids came to check on me, gave me kisses on my forehead and said they would pray for my headache to go away. Right before their bedtime Craig came in to see if I could get up for a minute. Out in the living room were three lit candles each representing our kids. Craig shared about how the candles represented them and how they were to be light in a dark place. He read some scriptures. Then we took communion as a family. We have never done that before (besides at church) and as Craig prayed over the bread (ritz crackers) and juice (kool-aid), the tears rolled.

I felt complete peace, despite my pounding head and I knew God was holding me. What would normally be a hugely stressful day for me, was fun and joyful. Recently I heard a pastor share about fear. His statement was "Fear is the absence of Faith". That really struck a chord with me, so lately when I feel fear rising up in me, over my kids, myself, my future, I try to speak blessings of faith over what I am fearing.

Jesus said to his disciples, "My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth." ~John 17:15-17

Our school year is off....and I will keep praying these blessing of faith over my children.

I cannot take credit for the notes on their cereal bowls. I copied that idea.

The three

First and Third


Sweet Brothers

We are close enough to walk to school....who does that, these days?

Wyatt getting settled....

Will finding his seat...he's like, "okay mom, hurry up and take the picture..."

Can you guess what Anna and I did before brothers got home?

A picture of hope...

We had 4 or 5 sunflowers pop up out of nowhere, I assume from the bird scattering bird seed around various spots in our yard. This morning on my run I noticed this one had bloomed, and it spoke to me.

Such a picture of hope.

A sunflower growing out of a dirty, paved, parking curb, right where Craig parks his truck. And yet, if it can thrive in such an unideal location, I am encouraged that I can do the same in my day to day life, no matter what the circumstances.

And look....it even got a great water supply today!

New do

Thanks for all your wonderful advice ladies. It is much appreciated. Here is my new do!

Opinions, please!

At the risk of sounding like my mom, who is always fussing over her hair, I'm going to post about the same topic because I need some feedback.

This friday I am getting my hair cut. I'm not sure what to do. My "goal" was to grow it out long, but whenever it reaches this point I always get frustrated with it and cut it off. I have a lot of hair, but it is fine in texture and tends to look stringy when it gets too long. Maybe after 32 years I will have to resign to the fact that I am not a long hair kind of girl.

This is my hair right after I finished doing it. Currently I am using one of those curling irons that blows out hot hair to give it some body when it is nearly dry. I used to use hot rollers but they broke. It looks this way for approximately 40 minutes, then falls flat. 99% of the time it ends up in a ponytail before the day is over.

The next issue is bangs. My bangs now reach my nose and I can't decide weather I want to cut them again or not. I have lots of options:

• cut bangs
• just get everything trimmed
• get a few inches cut off
• get more layers
• don't get layers
• or a combination of the above
  

Also, color. You probably couldn't tell, but I am not a natural blonde. Sometimes I get all highlights and sometimes I have low lights put in as well to balance out the color in the ends. The last time I got all highlights since it was the beginning of summer. Too fake? Should I put in low lights this time?
So ladies, I need opinions.
I know, shallowest post ever.